I found this on a friend's Myspace. I don't know if the stats are accurate or not, but it sure made me LOL.



Dear Red States,

We've decided we're leaving. We intend to form our own country, and we're taking the other Blue States with us. In case you aren't aware, that includes California , Hawaii , Oregon , Washington , Minnesota , Wisconsin , Michigan , Illinois and all the Northeast. We believe this split will be beneficial to the nation, and especially to the people of the new country of the New Union.



To sum up briefly: You get Texas , Oklahoma and all the slave states. We get stem cell research and the best beaches. We get the Statue of Liberty . You get Dollywood. We get Intel and Microsoft. You get WorldCom. We get Harvard. You get Ole' Miss. We get 85 percent of America 's venture capital and entrepreneurs. You get Alabama . We get two-thirds of the tax revenue, you get to make the red states pay their fair share.



Since our aggregate divorce rate is 22 percent lower than the Christian Coalition's, we get a bunch of happy families. You get a bunch of single moms. Please be aware that Nuevo California will be pro-choice and anti-war, and we're going to want all our citizens back from Iraq at once. If you need people to fight, ask your evangelicals.

They have kids they're apparently willing to send to their
deaths for no purpose, and they don't care if you don't show pictures of their children's caskets coming home. We do wish you success in Iraq , and hope that the WMDs turn up, but we're not willing to spend our resources in Bush's Quagmire.



With the Blue States in hand, we will have firm control of 80 percent of the country's fresh water, more than 90 percent of the pineapple and lettuce, 92 percent of the nation's fresh fruit, 95 percent of America 's quality wines (you can serve French wines at state dinners) 90 percent of all cheese, 90 percent of the high tech industry, most of the U.S. low-sulfur coal, all living redwoods, sequoias and condors, all the Ivy and Seven Sister schools plus Stanford , Cal Tech and MIT. With the Red States, on the other hand, you will have to cope with 88 percent of all obese Americans (and their projected health care costs), 92 percent of all U.S.

mosquitoes, nearly 100 percent of the tornadoes, 90 percent of the hurricanes, 99 percent of all Southern Baptists, virtually 100 percent of all
televangelists, Rush Limbaugh, Bob Jones University , Clemson and the University of Georgia . We get Hollywood and Yosemite , thank you.



Additionally, 38 percent of those in the Red states believe Jonah was actually swallowed by a whale, 62 percent believe life is sacred unless we're discussing the death penalty or gun laws, 44 percent say that evolution is only a theory, 53 percent that Saddam was involved in 9/11 and 61 percent of you crazy bastards believe you are people with higher morals then we lefties.



Finally, we're taking the good pot, too. You can have that dirt weed they grow in Mexico .




Peace out,
Blue States

Just to make it official.

"Congratulations! You're not perfect! It's ridiculous to want to be perfect anyway. But then, everybody's ridiculous sometimes, except perfect people. You know what perfect is? Perfect is not eating or drinking or talking or moving a muscle or making even the teensiest mistake. Perfect is never doing anything wrong - which means never doing anything at all. Perfect is boring! So you're not perfect! Wonderful! Have fun! Eat things that give you bad breath! Trip over your own shoelaces! Laugh! Let somebody else laugh at you! Perfect people never do any of those things. All they do is sit around and sip weak tea and think about how perfect they are. But they're really not one-hundred-percent perfect anyway. You should see them when they get the hiccups! Phooey! Who needs 'em? You can drink pickle juice and imitate gorillas and do silly dances and sing stupid songs and wear funny hats and be as imperfect as you please and still be a good person. Good people are hard to find nowadays. And they're a lot more fun than perfect people any day of the week."

~Stephen Manes, Be a Perfect Person in Just Three Days!

create your own visited states map
or check out these Google Hacks.



Only 11% of the country. To make myself feel better, I focus that I've been to England, Ireland, Scotland, and Wales, as well.

I need a vacation.

1. Who are you?
2. Are we friends?
3. When and how did we meet?
4. How have I affected you?
5. What do you think of me?
6. What's the fondest memory you have of me?
7. How long do you think we will be friends?
8. Do you love me?
9. Do you have a crush on me?
10. Would you kiss me?
11. Would you hug me?
12. Physically, what stands out?
13. Emotionally, what stands out?
14. Do you wish I was cooler?
16. Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.
17. Am I loveable?
18. How long have you known me?
19. Describe me in one word.
20. What was your first impression?
21. Do you still think that way about me now?
22. What do you think my weakness is?
23. Do you think I'll get married?
24. Would you ever go out with me?
25. What makes me sad?
26. What reminds you of me?
27. If you could give me anything what would it be?
28. How well do you know me?
29. When's the last time you saw me?
30. Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?
31. Do you think I could kill someone?
32. Are you going to put this on your Live Journal and see what I say about you?



I took out number fifteen because it's lame.

<3

Yes, last post of the year.

I had a pretty good day, besides the fact my aunt flaked out on me. AGAIN. That had me in a bad mood. But, I vented to Jordan, and it was okay again.

Amanda and I had an outing to the Wal-Mart area. We both bought Garden State, which just arrived. Only $15, sucka. Also bought a binder because mine's falling apart, soda, candy, and such. Our boy-bashing-venting-new-year's-eve party will commence in a few hours.

Tomorrow looks like it will be another family get together down below. Woohoo? Sure.

Happy New Year's Eve, all.

<3

So, the day before yesterday, the death toll from the tsunamis and earthquakes was 44,000, with thousands more missing. I look at the news this morning- more than 114,000 dead. Man, the power of nature is relentless.

Rained some more today. I could hear it pounding on my windows all night. It's supposed to clear up after this, right?

Well, my Phantom of the Opera outing was canceled for today, but rescheduled for Friday. So, I'm setting tomorrow up as my "MUST DO ESSAY" day. If you see me online tomorrow, tell me to get off and get my butt working on my essay. I'm tired of it hanging over my head.

I got two new CDs today- Sparta's "Porcelain" and Razorlight's "Up All Night".

Afterwards, I went over to Laurie's, where we and Charity, Jenn, and Lisa watched a few movies, including Bridget Jones' Diary and Dawn of the Dead. Yep. Dawn of the Dead sure was nice. And bloody. Oh, and FYI guys, that Michael character is English. Born in London. He did a pretty good job with covering up the accent, though. And the person playing the fat woman was actually a man. With much makeup.

Makes ya think, eh?

I couldn't see the stars from all the clouds in the sky last night, and I could smell the moisture in the air. There may be infinite number of things that I don't like about this town, but the night before and after a good rain is beautiful. The creosote bushes react with the moisture to let off this wonderful smell that can only be found in a desert. Take that, Lakewood.

So, it has done nothing but rain all today. The sound of the rain pounding on my window woke me up this morning. I loved it.

I beefed up my CD collection today by having a CD burning marathon with my older sister. I'm now 5 CDs richer in less than a day. Nice.

The movie Amelie happened to be on TV this evening, so I sat down and watched it. I swear, it gets better each time I see it.

Tomorrow is going to be spent seeing Phantom of the Opera.

I swore up and down I would get started on my essays, but guess what happened? Yes, I had my close buddy Procrastination stop by. I'll get started.

Eventually.

I did homework today. The chapter worksheet for AP US History sucks, kids. 35 terms.

Only my essay for history, and my one-page essay for the Girl's State thing to go. I'm hesitant to do the essay for Girl's State. It's only one page, but we have to talk about why we deserve to go to Girl's State this summer, and sort of sell yourself. I just don't feel comfortable talking about myself like that; it seems to much like bragging.

I didn't take a nap like I thought I would. Perhaps I'll sleep well tonight IN MY OWN BED.

I wasn't able to have my damn packages sent to John and Jordan. Something was wrong with them. Screw the post office. I'll get it done, though.

I also watched a movie on the Independent Film Channel called Kicked in the Head. Also, I saw the movie Karacter, a movie in German. I had to keep myself awake and read the subtitles so I wouldn't get lost, but I liked it a lot.

Seeing Phantom of the Opera in Palm Desert on Wednesday afternoon. Finally.

I'm in one crap of a mood.